Last week was the most exhausting emotional roller coaster I had ridden in my entire life so far. I received a job offer from another company on Monday, only to find out that I had less than 5 days to decide on whether I should push through with the offer or not.
I had plans of leaving, but I wanted a clean exit — if possible, 30 calendar days, but if the post was really urgent, I wanted to at least have 2 weeks for a clean turnover. However, my new employer bluntly advised that they cannot guarantee another training class for me to join beyond September 14th, so it was September 14th or never.
It was torture to change my decision several times a day. I was torn between staying in my comfort zone and taking a huge leap of faith. I had to sign the contract for the new role just so I could make myself stick to my decision to leave.
All throughout my almost four years of tenure, I think I’ve learned enough to last me a lifetime, or at least make me a more effective employee in my next work:
- Too much of something is really bad — no matter how much you love what you’re doing, if you don’t have a proper outlet, you’ll lose your sparkle and eventually hate what you’re doing when the stress starts to creep up on you. I only had South Korea for my sweet escapes, which suddenly became impossible because of the pandemic.
- There really is no such thing as a work-life balance. Either you have your life, or you have a booming career at work. I remember all those times when a co-team manager kept joking that our Cebu IT is not “open 24 hours” and it’s true. I remember being too scared to go back to Manila because I thought my work in Cebu wasn’t done yet. After two weeks, bam! Community quarantine happened. So what was the difference with me working from home in Cebu versus me working from home in Manila?
- They say to refuse an offer is an insult, but I learned the hard way that it is okay to reject an offer, especially if you feel you are not cut out for it. I am really not cut out to lead a team. ‘Nuff said.
- But things can still change. One day, I might feel that I am emotionally and mentally ready to lead a team and when I do, that is when I will apply for a promotion. Or I could find another career path that I want to follow that is more suited for my personality. I guess what I’m trying to say is I will make sure to follow my heart next time.
- A friend and now-former colleague told me on my last day: Be very picky on who you choose to befriend. See the good in everyone, but always expect that everyone can slip, and when they do, it’s enough reason for you to no longer associate yourself with them.
- On a lighter note — please make sure to render at least 30 days notice. I lost two weeks’ worth of unused vacation leaves from my last pay because this was an immediate resignation.
Tomorrow is my first day at my new company. I’m scared to death of going back to square one, but the fact that I chose a huge leap of faith is a sign of courage. I can do this, right?
To new beginnings.
Wish me luck, everyone! ❤
word salad 